TRUE Confidence in Community: Messy, Beautiful, Contagious (Confident Mom Series, Part. 4)
So glad to have you back- we are in the thick of our Confident Mom Series. So far, we’ve talked about TRUE confidence, 20 reasons insecurity MUST GO, the problem with “cosmo-confidence” and practical ways to overcome insecurity.
So let’s keep going, shall we?
Growing into a woman of TRUE confidence isn’t just about us. (Can I get an AMEN?)
It’s about being set free to live in relationships with our walls down, our hearts open and our lives available for the grace of God to flow in and through us. Sounds like heaven on earth, right? Well, that is God’s plan, and it’s how He taught us to pray. For His kingdom to come on earth as in heaven, and for unity, and for the health of the beautiful bride of Christ, called the church.
And it starts with you and me getting free and loving each other well.
It’s about being able to love and be loved, gracefully and authentically.
Growing into a woman of confidence means that we will take the risks of doing real life with real people. We will ask God to change us; to make us gracious, humble, loving, open and moldable, by Grace.
It’s TRUSTING GOD to build something beautiful in the midst of our mess.
Just this week I had a fabulous lunch with a dear friend. But the light-heartedness of our time together changed when a “sticky” topic of conversation came up. You know the kind that makes us mommas squirm. Usually stirring up comparisons with our family life, worry about our kids, unsure future plans, the pressure of making decisions in the grey areas of life. The table talk bounced back and forth to the beat of subtle, yet real insecurity. Both of us, backpedaling to step away from the vulnerable territory that said “whoa- don’t touch that shaky place”.
As I felt the atmosphere shift with an undertone of tension, I felt prompted to ask her if I had said something to offend her, and to offer an apology. When asked if she was okay, she said “of course” with a tender smile. Oh how many times I have chosen to say “of course” when really, I’m dying on the inside. Maybe too scared to be honest, or not even sure how to express the insecurity I felt, even with trusted friends.
I understood. I didn’t press further.
But my friend has a soft heart for God, and she is a responder to His pursuit. Her heart is tender and beautiful.
On her drive home from lunch, she called to talk about how she was really doing, and to tell me that indeed, our conversation had hit an “insecurity button” in her life. She was gracious and humble and loving and open. Open to God’s healing in her life, open to walking in TRUE confidence. Open to experiencing freedom in community.
She wanted a deeper freedom that comes through Christ’s love and demolishes the stronghold of insecurity.
And in that phone call was VICTORY and FREEDOM beginning on a new level. For BOTH of us.
She was RECOGNIZING INSECURITY at work in the nitty gritty parts of life, and calling it out as “not welcome”. She was asking God to replace her insecurity with truth, and was stepping out to grab onto His faithfulness in the midst of her questions. And she was allowing me into that process with her.
When she called to clear things up with me ( I LOVE her for that), she set me on the path to more freedom in ways she didn’t even know. That’s the power of community.
- When we get free, it impacts the people around us.
- When we walk in TRUE confidence it builds others up.
- When we pursue wholeness in Christ, it paves the way for others to follow and find freedom for themselves.
It’s the ripple effect of freedom. And we were created to pursue TRUE confidence together.
I was inspired to pursue more depth of TRUE confidence in my heart yesterday, because my friend was genuinely pursuing TRUE confidence in hers.
Don’t you see? It’s contagious.
It takes work, and it can be messy, but the beautiful fruit of someone’s life who is trusting God and leaning on Him (someone who walks in TRUE confidence) is so sweet and so attractive.
Let’s do this together.
Friends- I am praying for genuine relationships in your life. I know, from experience, that it is so hard to find these sorts of relationships. Friends who are trustworthy, safe, humble, caring; friends who love you and want the very best for you and your family. If you can, I encourage you to “unplug” from your electronic world and get face to face with friends this weekend.
- Do a cook-out with another family.
- Go to breakfast before church with friends.
- Get involved in a small group.
- Find a MOPS group or another mother’s group near you.
Be intentional to find a way to connect on a HEART level with people and build trust, so that together you can find freedom and walk out TRUE confidence. It’s so much better to do life with people, than alone. It’s what we were made for and what we all crave.
What do you find is your biggest craving or prayer when it comes to experiencing community? I’d love to pray with you!